Cristina Paynes

Don’t be fooled by the number above your head. Life is very short. Take the selfie. Post it. Love yourself. 

Everyday we wake up and force ourselves to do what we are “supposed” to do. Many of us live in a wake/sleep/repeat cycle, so called life. I’ve been wanting to write, but every time I try it feels forced. Part of me has left and I’m not sure where I went.

I go on walks, trying to see if I can find myself again. I would like to see a glimpse of me, somewhere. But I haven’t been able to find me in a long time.

I keep telling myself that I’m working on something bigger, but I’m not doing anything that resembles even trying. I want to do so many things and I get overwhelmed by it all. I want to start so many things at once then don’t do any of them.

Every morning I get this urge to get dressed, and leave the house. Go on a walk. But then feel guilty for not waiting for my husband that loves to sleep in and many times I feel I could’ve gone on a walk and he wouldn’t have even noticed. I love sharing my me time with him, but I need to learn to not want to share it. After all, it is my me time.

I definitely have to change my patterns, otherwise my days will continue to look the same. Wake/Sleep/Repeat.

Okay, well I’ll talk to y’all later. -XOXO